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DATING

Do you know according to American history, the concept of Dating began between the late 1800s and the first few decades of the 1900s and it added new stages to courtship, meaning before then, people only courted?

So, what is a Date? And what exactly is DATING?

What is a Date?

The word “date” was probably originally used as a lower-class slang word for booking an appointment with a prostitute.

However, by the turn of the 20th century, the word was being used to describe lower-class men and women going out socially to public dances, parties and other meeting places, primarily in urban centres where women had to share small apartments and did not have spacious front parlours in their homes to which to invite men to call.

With the rise of the entertainment culture, with its movie houses and dance halls and their universal appeal across class lines, Dating quickly moved up the socio-economic ladder to include middle- and upper-class men and women, as well as the new urbanites. Moreover, since the whole world is a global village, the new culture of dating gained ground so fast around the world.

What exactly is DATING?

Dating can be defined as a casual or long-term sexual relationship or, rarely, a platonic relationship between a man and a woman without any intention of marriage (commitment). It involves making a usually romantic social arrangement to meet with someone.

With the onset of the sexual revolution, the question arose, “Why would a man court and woo a woman when he could gain a chief benefit of marriage while dating her, namely sexual gratification, for free with no commitment?” (Friendship “with benefits” is a contemporary example.)

What is Courtship?

Courtship involves one man and one woman spending intentional time together to get to know each other with the expressed purpose of evaluating the other as a potential husband or wife. The man and the woman usually were members of the same community, and the courting usually was done in the woman’s home in the presence (and under the watchful eye) of her family, most often Mom and brothers.

For many, courtship is an old-fashioned word. It summons visions of men wooing women with small tokens of affection and asking for their hand in marriage on bended knees. For social scientists, studies of courtship usually look at the process of  “mate selection.”

Is Dating scriptural?

The answer is “No, It is not!” There is no account of dating in the Bible but there are examples of betrothal (courtship) in the Bible. Read Genesis 24 and Matthew 1:18-19.

Should believers date?

No, they should not! Rather, it is advisable for mature believers in Christ, ready to get married, to sincerely and diligently seek God’s Face on their own for their would-be spouses before approaching them and a brother or sister is not expected to date or court several people in God’s House without any commitment to one person.

If you walk in love, light and wisdom; hearing, obeying and closely following God’s instructions, He will guide you to the right woman, if you are a man and will lead the right man to you, if you are a woman.
God has unique spouses for all His children.

Underage youngsters in primary and secondary schools, even in tertiary institutions who are still being clothed and fed (sponsored) should be discouraged from dating because of their limited knowledge of the truth and essence of life. If they are born again, they should focus more on living visible traces of Jesus for their peers to see.

In conclusion, dating is not for Christians, courtship is!

Shalom.

Excerpt from “A Brief History of Courtship and Dating in America, Part 1 & 2 by SKIP BURZUMATO”. (An insightful article I stumbled upon while researching the history of dating).

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