Two mothers sat together on a cool Saturday morning watching with interest, as their husbands and children played handball with other families at a Sports Programme organized by their church for all families.
In less than five minutes, Mother A sighed and said; ‘ “I’m married to the laziest and poorest man in the world. I wish I could find someone else”.
Surprised, Mother B turned to look at her with interest as she continued complaining, “We’ve been married for 6 years, but he still works as a salesman in a Furniture Company. We live in a 2 bedroom apartment with our three children and own just one car. Apart from this programme organized by the church, my family has never had a special family outing, nor gone on vacation. I really feel sorry for myself for ever accepting his marriage proposal in the first place”
Mother B, now disgusted and very disappointed said, “Wow! You are the most ungrateful woman I have ever seen” “Do you know how many women who would love to be married to a husband like yours? Do you know how many men, Fathers! out there still searching for jobs and cannot even afford good homes for their families?”
“You should be ashamed of yourself, because you deserve quite worse than you even have”. “If you think he is poor and lazy, why don’t you help him out by supporting?”
After listening with rapt attention to the responses of Mother B, Mother A suddenly became very remorseful and ashamed of herself, though she was unaware of the fact that Mother B who she considered a virtuous woman had divorced the very first man she married for similar reasons, before she remarried the rich man with whom she had her children.
Like most of us today, Mother B pushing aside her mistakes and wrong doing, became a judge in another person’s matter instead of first trying to understand
her reasons, giving her a shoulder to cry on or even sharing her own story with her and encouraging her to look at the good sides of her husband and save her marriage.
Her reaction as a Christian at that point in time could either make or mar the person confiding in her and seeking solace even for the most unwise reasons.
Oftentimes, we forget that when Jesus taught about ‘Judging Others’ in Matthew 7:1-5, He advised us to desist from acting as judges in other people’s matters, when we have similar or even worse problems beyond our control.
The plank here symbolizes very visible problems that an individual may be facing. It is therefore funny when such an individual decides to push that aside and help others with their little problems
This is why in Luke 6:42, it was restated, that rather than being a Hypocrite, it is more honorable to take care of your problems first, then you can help others.
As Matthew 7:14 rightly stated, if two people with things covering their eyes choose to walk together, they will walk a little distance but ultimately fall.
The Bible clearly states that Jesus frowns at the act of judging others especially, when we ourselves are far from where we ought to be in total moral uprightness before God.
Therefore, in order to stick to the standards that Jesus set for us through the Scriptures, we must always solve our problems first, before turning others to the Holy Spirit to help them, whenever we identify their need for help.
May God always grant the grace to be helpers of one another’s faith instead of subjecting those in need of our prayers and help to shame, thus doing the body of Christ a disservice.
God bless us all as this change begins with us!